To have a friend is to share truths,
but what if yours are unspeakable truths?
To have a friend means you cannot spread lies,
but what if your life is tangled in lies?
To have a friend means you cannot have secrets,
but what if you have horrible secrets?
To have a friend means you need to get close,
but what if you, your mind and heart are isolated?
To have a friend means a new concept of space,
but what if you have no room?
I lost my friends because of you.
Or was it because I was so consumed in our relationship?
I lost my worldview because of you.
Or was it because of all the lies I had to tell?
I lost my sense in self because of you,
or was it because I held both your and my secrets so tight.
I have many unspeakable truths and they begin long ago,
but the hardest truth is learning to commit to the most important person, myself.